Hello from all the sides 

  
Hello friends! Happy 2016! Something I can still say like the mother of two I am, a woman who hopes that it’s still cool to raise the roof! To Roger Rabbit! Some things that have happened in the past forever months:  
I turned a year older though I am forever 21! And dress like it! Even though whenever I do walk into Forever 21, the young lady says, “Oh are you shopping for your daughter?” Exactly what I want to hear. Anyway, it was a lovely few days of celebration, filled with food and drinks and a free burger at Red Robin I was very happy to accept. Plus I was as happy as I was in this photo, with the OG Chuck E.Cheese whom my mom wrote as, “Chuck & Cheese.” 

Also, I stepped on the scale for the first time in two years and hello a lot has happened in two years, but I attribute the weight to the life of great food and drinks I’ve been welcoming into my life. There has been wine, nachos, dim sum, shrimp, fries, burgers, rice, sushi, etc. like I was the hungry caterpillar who spends a week eating through candy and sausage and pie until it eats a leaf and becomes a butterfly. So maybe I’ll become a butterfly! 

  
Despite what this nacho-heaven-gorging photo suggests, I’ve been eating better and curbed my drinking. I just want to feel good again and not let out a guttural, “UGHHH” every time I wake up. So there’s more movement, less eating, no wine this week and thankfully as of yesterday, a few pounds lost. 

 Also, yesterday I walked 8,500 steps because I took the bus and traipsed through downtown Seattle, something I rarely do any more. I do love walking, my favorite pace because I call my sister, get in some fresh air and light exercise without sounding like a heaving breathing phone prankster. 

 
  
I feel good about this year and what I’ve done so far. There’s a lot of comedy on the horizon, some huge shows I’ll be performing and I hope I get to see you at one of them soon, friend.

bad parenting, worse fashion

  
I was cleaning out some cookbooks which I never used. They were from a period of time when I thought I was a vegetarian and could cook like one. But deep in the archives of Mona’s Temporary Diet Because It Sounded Nice Presidential Library, I found a tin with an empty bottle of Crown Royal and the purple bag. I am the only one who drinks in this house and it’s been years since I’ve had whiskey. 
What was Past Mo doing, hoarding liquor bottles because they might have some resale value in the post-apocalyptic world where instead of currency, we pay for goods in empty liters of Malibu Rum, Apple Pucker, and other low shelf cocktails I would drink because I have the palette of a college coed who just turned 21 but really likes candy.  
I would like a sandwich sir, I have this empty jug of gas station Chablis. Yes, I’ll need change.

  
I also found a mini-Maker’s Mark santa cap that is supposed to go on the bottle and not what TJ suggested when it was too small to fit on his head: Is this for babies? Are babies going to wear this? Yes, if they want to cry out for help that they need new parents. TJ tried to wear it but I told him no. It doesn’t go well with the Virginia Slims sweater vest I bought him for Christmas. I have to have some standards.

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