*I wish my stomach was huge and protruding. Maybe then I could get a seat on the bus. So I’ve taken to wearing maternity tops because it makes me look more pregnant than I am and I have to submit to them anyway.

*I got the most superficial email from my ex-boss. There was a short line hoping that I don’t have morning sickness (insert eye-rolling here) and the bulk of it telling me to do follow-up on a project that ended three months ago. I told her no. Why won’t she leave me alone? Some people don’t get it. This is the same woman who confused my boredom-on-the-job as signs I was in an abusive relationship. I mean, WTF?

*I wish I could attack people with glue-guns then blame it on my pregnancy hormones. That way, I could get the fucker in my class who badmouthed my creative writing professor and shrug and point to my belly.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Speak Your Mind


CommentLuv badge