Discipline

So while I’m taking one my hurried-baths and my mom walks in and notices my underwear on the floor. She bends over, covers it with my other clothing and exits. This would be strange and invasive to anyone else, but this is my mother. Mind you, this is the same woman who forced me try on clothes in JC Penney outside the dressing room because she said, “No one’s looking.”

After this morning’s bathroom incident, she stops our lunch conversation to say, “You know Mona, you have to be very strict with your panty. You can’t just leave it lying around. Men don’t like to see that.”

“I have to be very strict with my panty?” I ask. “Well, Mom, this is very disappointing because I just had a long talk with my panty. I laid out some rules with my panty. I thought we had an undie-standing.”

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