Recently, I’ve spoken to two people whom I haven’t seen since back in the day. I would drink jaggermiester and yell at strangers while my body was half-suspended through an open car window. During both times, I was stumped as to how to summarize what’s happened in the past few years without being equally as dull as a mono-syallabic recap: Wife. Grad. Mom.
“So what have you been up to?” He asks.
“Oh, nothing much.” [Here’s when my eyes beam in direction of surgically attached stroller] “You know. Same old. Same old.”
And the other person hugged me but was obviously waaay more into the hug I was. I hug like a limp fish. What was I supposed to do? Ask for a re-hug and instead body slam him in round two? This is why I hate greeting people. I never know when to extend my hand or plant a kiss on the cheek or perform a grinding hip snuggle.
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is my new favorite show. I love tonight’s quote:
“That doesn’t unbang your mom. You’ve got to do something worse.”
And now, pictures!
You and me both, bud.