when I was young

Mike received a letter from my mother today. I don’t know why my mom would send a 4×6 picture of my 14-year-old self covered under two tons of dockside hooker makeup, but then again, this is from a woman who calls crystal meth, “meta-feminine.” Look at that hair! It looks like a Q-tip that just returned from a hobo’s ear. I am rocking a vanilla face that is a completely different color from the mother-of-pearl shoulders.

Me @ 14

Just so you know, from the waist down, I wore rolled-up shorts and skechers. From the waist up, I wore half a blue ostrich and the best made in china jewelery two dollars could buy.

The glamour shot was my rite of passage. I know countless girls (and one boy) who sat still in studios, holding popped up collars of pleather jackets or posing with feather boas necklaced on their shoulders. A year after that photo was taken, I started listening to Rammstein, memorized The Cure lyrics and perfected my WPM on #IRC channels.

And so I ask this: I want to see your glamour shots or yearbook photos, perhaps something cringe-worthy that you hope doesn’t find its way to you via USPS. And a paragraph about it would be nice. And if you send me a Target gift certificate so I can buy Nathan his Britax carseat, I’ll let you name my second child.

An email will do in the meantime.

EDIT: I realized I haven’t posted my new hair, so here goes. Now with flip!

Me @ 23

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Comments

  1. Mommy off the Record says:

    1) Love the new ‘do.

    2) You look smashing in that blue feather boa and the 2 dollar jewlery. That is a pic for the ages.

    3) You must be insane if you think I’m gonna send you any of my yearbook pictures. Unfortunately, I’ve burned them all. But nice try.

  2. rachel a jew says:

    Love it! Glamour shots eat your heart out! This is blackmail material. I don’t have anything like this…but I do have some incriminating “winter formal” pics…Oooh, my scanner is broken…hmmm.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Great glam shot! (and the one when you’re young is great too!)

  4. great pics. what did mike say about it?

    btw, you’re making an outstanding decision about the britax carseat. i reallllllllllllllllllly want one too. too bad guam doesn’t sell them. the straps don’t roll up like the others. take pics when you get it!

  5. Looks like we got the same cut! Mine is way flippy now that I washed and styled it myself.

    If I had a scanner, I would so send you some shots of me as a teenager. My sis did the glamour shots, I never did. But I did a couple photo shoots for modeling back in the day…

  6. Joleen – My sister (who lives on Saipan) ordered her Britax online. But I don’t remember from which vendor – if I remember to I’ll ask and just post it on my blog. It got here quickly and in great condition, and I don’t think the shipping was outrageous.

  7. Great Glamour Shot! I secretly wanted Glamour Shots as a kid, but never asked my mom. One day when I was a freshman in high school, my then-boyfriend called me and told me he was going to pick me up. He took me to the Glamour Shot appointment his mom made…it was fun. =)

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