I’m trying to finish Atonement before the movie comes out because there’ll likely be some pretentious jerkface going on about how the book is sooo much better than the movie. Don’t try to cut me down with your Senior Thesis babble, dude. And you know what? If I wanted to know how the book was, I would have read it.
I’m trying to finish it quickly because I’ve had it for four years and barely waded through the first half. And also, I don’t want to have an English Battle Royale because I’ll throw down with my analysis of postmodern poetics. Oh snap!
In college, it was easy to spot the English major: the guy with the weathered-copy of Kant holding it front in a pose that screamed, “Ask me about my existentialism! I have more leather-bound books at home!” Or the gal with the Nalgene bottled back-pack, wearing a Radiohead t-shirt and a brooding look on her face, brow furrowed while scribbling profound musings into a journal. Get a band-aid because there’s some biting wit in there! Then there were those who looked completely normal and yet would spew off some eye-roll worthy line like, “I don’t listen to music because it interferes with my thoughts.” REALLY? I wouldn’t want to keep you from that abysmal thought train, one which is probably busy listing out all the celebrities you’d make out with if they could look over the fact that your studio apartment is covered with pictures from that one semester you spent in Europe. And would also not mind your roommate Steve, who gets the IKEA futon every other night.
If I ever sound that pretentious, you can shoot me on site.
Oh hey Mona?
Yes, my internet friend?