this doesn’t help my ego

Since we drove in separate cars to Nathan’s hearing appointment, Mike was behind me as we sat at the red light. The man next to me honked his horn several times to get my attention. I rolled down the window and we exchanged some words before he drove away.

When we got home, Mike asked, “What did that guy say to you?”

“He asked me for my phone number. But then I told him I was married and he drove off.”

My husband paused for a second then said, “Okay, what did he really say to you?”

“He asked me for directions to Harborview.”

No one hits on me anymore. The last guy who hit on me was the baker who always sliced my baguettes for free. Then I found out that it was store policy and he slices everyone’s baguettes free of charge. I bet he really does want to tap my fine self, but has to say a spiel about polices and yada yada yada but he secretly kneads his bread into round shapes and giggles while whispering, “Boobies.”

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  1. Mrs. Blogoway says:

    Too funny. I bet he thinks of you as he makes sticky buns.

  2. Teehee, sticky buns…

  3. How did the hearing appointment go?

  4. I hear ya! The closest I get is the geriatric at the grocery store asking me where the celery is!

  5. This is like that Till Death episode where the wife refuses to believe that the husband could be having an affair and then he gets pissed. Heh.

    Hope the appointment went well.

  6. If you’re looking for a boost of confidence just head downtown to the bus stop at 3rd & Pine! Hobos are super lusty during rush hour.

    Me: [walking through the rain feeling dumpy]
    Lusty hobo: Girl, if you didn’t look so married I’d ask you.
    Me: BFF, stinky pee man!

    I hope the appointment went well and Nathan was awarded numerous gold stars!

  7. Hilarious.

    I did have a guy who used to cut the crusts off my sandwiches, but, yeah, that hasn’t happened in a long time.

  8. Chickenbells says:

    NO no no…you TOTALLY get hit on…all the time, you just don’t realize it because people are so sly now, because you’re not out at the bars dancing the night away…or, it’s the guys you don’t want to have hitting on you that are doing it (this is what I tell myself to make myself feel better because no one’s honkin any horns at me…)

  9. Oh that is hilarious.

  10. Butrfly Garden says:

    I don’t get hit on any more, either. And I used to be sooo sick of getting hit on everywhere I went. Pshaw.

    I’ll hit on you if you hit on me. šŸ˜€

  11. I don’t get hit on anymore either. The lingering smell of vomit and pee may have something to do with it.

    Nothing like toddler repellent.

  12. too funny…I know the feeling though..Nobody makes those long drawn out kissy noises @ me anymore either. The other day as I was exiting the beauty shop, this guy yelled out the window of his car “WOW”! I was like, FINALLY! I went around the whole day and bragged to everyone I came in contact with that I had been “WOW’D”..he he

  13. *In my best Joey Tribbiani tone*(which isn’t much) “how you doin’?”

  14. Found you through Julie.

    No one hits on me anymore either. They used to hit on me jogging, now, it’s nothing.

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