I had to take Nathan to the doctor yesterday because he has two ear infections raging his huge head. The doctor said to use warm drops of olive oil instead of fancy homeopathic drops. I wish I had known that before we bought fancy lavender scented ORGANIC ear drops with a woman breastfeeding on the box. I think there might have been a moon in the background because I thought the only thing that would soothe the savage beast my child has transformed into would be a hippie store with a whole shelf dedicated to womb-moon correlations.
I was not prepared for how messy it would be and how Nathan would rather stick his finger into his slicked ear canal and then proceed to touch everything in the living room. And this would be fine if I wanted to have couch scallopini, but I don’t. I don’t want to live in Olive Garden where they say when you’re there you’re family when my real family has never told me that it’ll be a 45 minute to an hour wait before we’ll be seated nor have they ever huffed out an arms akimbo response of, “No, Ma’am, we won’t watch your child while you wait in the bar.”
But the drops seem to be working, which is enough reason for us to leave Nathan with his daycare provider so we can go on a date! A real date! And my internet friend, if you can guess which taco bus we’ll be dining in tonight, you get a gold star. Happy Valentine’s Day!