Mammas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Canon Haters

Our family spent some time at Alki this afternoon, tossing stones into the tide and telling each other how awesome Mommy is (Yes, I talk about myself in third person. And also from Nathan’s point of view. Boobs!)

I was shepherding Nathan back to the car, my camera in tow, when two teenage girls eyed me as they passed.

“HAHAHA! CANON!” One cackled.

“Like, who buys a fucking Canon?” the other snorted.

The two of them continued giggling down the path behind me and suddenly I realized they were talking about me and my Canon.

Really? Is this a scene from High School Musical I missed? Did iCarly address this in the episode, “Like Canons, OMG!” Don’t they know that this line of discourse is reserved for writing in the margins of your Trapper Keeper? I was openly scoffed by teenagers who probably had their parents purchase these kit cameras so they could jazz up their myspace profiles.

And to drop the f-bomb on something as useless as Canon vs. Nikon (both are FINE cameras)? I can think of a dozen more relevant debates like East Coast rap versus West Coast rap (TUPAC!) and the British version of The Office versus the American version (USA! USA! USA!).

And since I had said absolutely nothing to them because of the whole possibility of being charged as an adult and losing custody of my son, Nathan ran after Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Rambo Headband, eager to avenge my honor and bite those legging-clad ankles. He really just wanted to let them know that their energies would be best applied at the nearest McDonald’s, where I hear they’re looking for a proofreader.

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  1. Angella says:


    I could see if you were shooting an Olympus. BUT A CANON???

    I own one, yes, but I know that the Nikon is (almost) just as good šŸ˜‰

    But seriously. Nikon vs. Canon is a circle argument. You really cannot dis either.


  2. Mamacita Chilena says:

    The whole Canon/Nikon debate just annoys me. Everyone has their allegiances, and it’s like arguing religion…you’re never going to change someone’s mind that their belief is WRONG.

    Personally, I’m a Canon girl all the way. Unfortunately for me, at the wedding I shot two weekends ago, the groom’s uncle was Vice President of Nikon Chile. His first order of business at the wedding, was to tell me how crazy and out of date I am for using Canon. If he wasn’t like 190 years old, I would have smacked his wrinkly ass back to Santiago!

  3. angella: It is a circle argument! It’s such a waste of time and really illustrated how immature those two were.

    mamacita chilena: Yowza! I hate people like that who feel the tremendous need to embarrass people publicly. If he were a real business man, he would have given you a free Nikon setup. Lame.

  4. Swistle says:

    Okay, even if you were taking pictures with a STORE-BRAND ONE-TIME-USE camera, I don’t see why ANYONE would think it was something for strangers to care about and remark on. What was their DEAL? What is THEIR interest in YOUR camera?

  5. Type (little) a says:

    I do shoot with an Olympus! I guess I’d be sitting alone at my loser olympus lunch table.

  6. What is UP with that red headband?

  7. Tweedle Rambo Headband! HAHAHAHA! I swear to God I am going to sound like a grandparent but why don’t kids have manners nowadays? I would never had said something like that- especially since it’s not even true.

    Also, I am pretty sure I drove by that EXACT McD’s sign (by Target?) this weekend!

  8. Yeah, I don’t think I could possibly be insulted by anything Tweedle Rambo Headband said. Because have you seen her freaking headband? Ha!

  9. Chickenbells says:

    Yeah…a Kodak? Then we’d be talking…but a Canon?! I heart my canon…

    And ladies? Headbands?! Perhaps that’s what you should have been questioning…then again, this is the generation of girls who don’t buy pants that fit so we’re all subjected to their muffin tops and lack of acceptable panties…

  10. I am secretly rooting for Nathan to push dumb and dumber down that ramp.

  11. Pickles & Dimes says:

    Dammit, I have a Canon!

    Also, what in the holy hell is up with that red headband? Good lord.

    This whole post was hilarious.

  12. Pickles & Dimes says:

    Also, is one of them wearing TIGHTS under her shorts???????????!???????

  13. skiplovey says:

    WTF? I had no idea Canon lacked viable street cred these days.

    Step off beetchez, Canon REPRESENT!

  14. !!! OH NO SHE DI-N’T !!!

    Since when was it legal for Ann Coulter’s fan club to be out in public without a moral chaperone?

    ! REALLY !

    And someone needs to tell that fat chick in the white T that it’s a fashion “NO NO” to wear the elastic band from her panties she wore in 4th grade around her head.

    ! REALLY !

    And here’s a tip… how bout you two hateful bitches get dressed with the lights on next time.

    ! REALLY !

    It’s truly sad that some people have no sense of class… but don’t sweat it Mona… I’m sure Karma has something really nice planned for these two.

    PS… you rock ! \m/ \m/

  15. Well I’ve got a Nikon. Neener neener neener! Yeah…it is a point and shoot, the zoom is broken, the battery case won’t stay closed, and the date resets with every use. But it’s a Nikon.

    If we didn’t just buy a new air con, plan on buying another, and buy cement and crap to fix the roof, James would have bought me a new Canon. One day.

  16. Melinda says:

    OMG, those teenagers are idiots. And, I am totally not getting their ridiculous outfits…

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