Why is it cellphones are so complicated? My cellphone contract is up for renewal which means I can upgrade to a phone that wasn’t invented right after people stopped calling them “mobile phones,” or waved them around like little flags of “Hey Look At Me” self-importance. Wait, they still do that? I know I would like to be able to take photos, listen to music and keep a calendar. I’m thinking of holding out for the 3g iPhone coming out next week, or the BlackBerry Curve or just chucking all cell phone upgrades in favor of yelling really loud. The last option would work, but I bet I’d get poor reception.
Why is it that everyone’s life easier than mine? Whenever I have a particularly stressful day at work or a commute that annihilates a hairdo that I had carefully created that morning, I look around me and see all these people who seem to have it together and my mind starts drifting into their lives, how the women in the clickety-clack high heels have never imagined how wide their feet become after giving birth or the college student taking up two seats on the bus with his bag and schleps his laundry home on the weekend.
Maybe it’s the rain that makes turns my head into a free verse LSD trip, the way I am when I drive through a rich neighborhood and am struck with the powerful need to park my three-hub-capped car behind the elegant shrubbery, gallop across the lawn and press my face against the cool window panes in hopes of stealing a glimpse of Viking subzero refrigerators that never house takeout containers from Denny’s and the room where the rich people swim in their money like Scrooge McDuck.