Thank you so much for all the supportive messages on facebook, twitter and on this blog. It’s heartburstingly awesome that I say something like I’m pregnant and there’s a collective “YAY!” that rings through the internet. So thank you many times over and I hope you’ll come over and babysit this hatchling because holy harry potter if I’m this tired during the pregnancy, I can only imagine the equation being Screaming Baby + Screaming Toddler = Mommy Yelling So She Can Win Mario Party 8’s Star Battle Because BOWSER IS TOTALLY CHEATING!
I am truly excited for this second child, but this feeling juts against the incredible first trimester exhaustion that has set in. I yawn a lot during the day, try to work harder to fight off desires to crawl under my desk and nap. I haven’t taken a flat iron to my thick jungle hair mop because it requires my lifting my arms above my head and really, that energy is better spent doing something else, like dreaming of George Clooney.
Right after I announced that I was pregnant, I had my first sexy dream with Mr. Clooney. He let me trace his stomach muscles with my fingertips but I woke up before we got to make our own movie: Ocean’s Sixty-Nine. My other pregnancy dreams, while not as bow-chica-bow-wow, are still incredible. The kind of government-experimenting-with-LSD vividness that makes me wish I could have recorded it so I can relive swinging on vines through through a foggy jungle while screaming, “WEEEEEE!”
This part of the pregnancy I love–the dreams, the trips to the consignment store for maternity tops and pants (even though I discovered Gap makes maternity pants with a TAPERED LEG? Really, GAP? ). There are other parts of this early pregnancy that I can easily categorize as “I HATE YOU AND YOUR ASSFACE” which include but are not limited to: monstrous prenatal pills and vitamins, the fish burps from pills that promise no fish burps, and my lack of interest in food.
I recognize the anti-cravings since I had them with Nathan and the last time they were so intense, I practically collapsed in my husband’s arms, crying, “THIS BABY HAS STOLEN MY LOVE OF FOOD!” It’s almost that bad now. I make laps around the grocery store, looking for something–anything– that sounds appealing, but I walk out with barely enough to feed a toddler. I eat because I have to, because the baby needs vitamins and minerals but I have not had a satisfying meal in weeks.
If you can think of anything I should try eating, something with texture and crunch because lord I am having some mouthfeel issues this week, I’d really appreciate it.