why I need glasses

I was at the red light. There was a large truck on the other side of the intersection. I couldn’t see the driver through the tint, but what struck me was the CNMI flag that hung from his rearview mirror.

the cnmi flag

So I immediately I thought, maybe he’s from Saipan! I’m from Saipan! I bolted into SEXY FACE MODE, eyeing him and giving the Lucille Bluth wink (which is really my wink in 40 years) but I still couldn’t make out his face.

More weird squint-winking and the light turned green. As my car passed his, I then realized that it was not the CNMI Flag that I was eyeing with its mysterious driver, it was a bright blue handicap parking permit:

So all this to say: I need glasses and HOW YOU DOING HOTTIE WITH LIMITED MOBILITY? I’ll hold your oxygen tank any day.

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Comments

  1. Well, that encounter was completely the driver’s fault, as you aren’t supposed to be driving around with the handicap parking tag on your rear-view! So there.

    Hey sister I’m so glad they have such beautiful warm beaches in Saipan, and I’m so glad you had a great time. However, I’m pretty sure that they don’t have Words With Friends there? Is that why you let all our games lapse? 😛

  2. I just wanted to gently point out that the way this is worded, it implies that someone with limited mobility is inherently unattractive (which I’m sure is not what you intended).

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