My inbox is inundated with Mother’s Day Gift Guides, but they’re all being directed to the wrong person. These companies need to email my husband and my sons, if they can ever stop watching Super Mario Bros YouTube videos or if TJ could finally learn how to read, maybe they could get an idea. I already know what I want and it’s just a new watch or a magazine subscription. Those are things I would buy myself or at least passive aggressively sigh around the house and yell, “You know what time it is?! I DON’T!”
I want a Whole Foods brunch which is what I had a few years ago. I had this gorgeous plate of food plus a mimosa and it was the kind of breakfast that made me so happy. I wish I could have a champagne breakfast every weekend but because I live in the real world and not my pink fluffy fantasy where my own children do not use my shirt as a napkin, it’s a luxury I want and deserve at least three times a year (Mother’s Day, my birthday, and whatever holiday I make up because I can!).
Whole Foods is hosting two fun events for moms. On Thursday, May 9th, check out your local Whole Foods locations for Mom-O-Rama: between 10 am and 1 pm there will be offerings like wine and cheese pairings, beauty and care samples, and more, plus the first 50 moms to attend will receive a free gift bag filled with Mother’s Day goodies.
I will be working on that day (no free things for me!) but definitely not on Sunday, May 12th, when the Bellevue and Interbay locations will have Mother’s Day Brunch options and I will be there stuffing an omelette quickly into my mouth before a toddler instructs me to pass the plate over to him.
I am not being paid to say any of that. I genuinely enjoy Whole Foods and what I really want is a do-over of that Mother’s Day brunch. I love the low-key but nicer-than-Denny’s kind of meal where I can eat delicious food and still have my kids around. We had ordered our food and brought it back to our tables. After I had licked my plate clean and it was time to go, Mike decided to take TJ and Nathan, leaving me alone to clear the table. On Mother’s Day. I was frustrated at how he couldn’t see that was a foul move and later he explained that he didn’t know where all the different utensils and cups and plates went even though THERE ARE SIGNS. Also bins with dishes and plates already inside!
I have already addressed this with my husband, that I would like this brunch again and have asked kindly that I DO NOT BUS MY OWN TABLE WHEN IT IS MOTHER’S DAY. He has very kind about it even with my crabbiness and my memory bank that only keeps record of times I have been wronged, I know he wants to make it a nice day for me.
While I want food and unsolicited compliments (“Not bad for two kids!” “You gave birth to us? No way!”), Nathan had the best idea of all when he said, “You know what I’m going to give you for Mother’s Day? Sleep. You just sleep all day.”
That sounds so dreamy.