It’s July 4th! Or Indepants Day, the holiday only I celebrate because no one else has signed on to this catchphrase so I sit alone, eating watermelon and saying the cleverest name to myself. I know how to party.
So do my boys, who found ways to make poop jokes at the “snake bomb.”
Freedom is running with your brother until your mom calls you back to the other end of the parking lot, where there are more sparklers to light and all the time in the world for a fart joke.